How to Talk to a Loved One who May be Experiencing Suicidal Ideation

Written by Ashley Emmel, MSW, LCSW

Talking to a loved one who may be suicidal is delicate but incredibly important. Here are some steps to help you approach the conversation with care and compassion:

1. Create a Safe Space

  • Find a quiet, private place to talk.

  • Make sure you have enough time to listen without rushing.

  • Approach them with warmth and concern.

2. Be Direct but Gentle

  • Ask open-ended questions:

    • “I’ve noticed you’ve been struggling lately. Do you want to talk about it?”

    • “Are you feeling overwhelmed or hopeless?”

  • If you suspect they’re suicidal, ask directly:

    • “Are you thinking about hurting yourself?”

    • “Have you thought about ending your life?”
      Asking doesn’t put the idea in their head—it shows you care. Directly asking is a very important part of this interaction with your loved one.

3. Listen Without Judgment

  • Let them talk without interrupting.

  • Avoid dismissing their feelings (e.g., “You have so much to be grateful for”).

  • Show empathy: “That sounds really hard. I’m here for you.”

4. Offer Support, Not Solutions

  • You don’t have to "fix" things—just being there matters.

  • Ask what they need: “How can I help?”

  • Encourage professional help: “Talking to a therapist could really help—would you like me to go with you?” 

5. Take Threats Seriously

  • If they have a plan, means, or timeline to harm themselves, don’t leave them alone.

  • Call a crisis line or emergency services if necessary.

  • Remove potential means of harm if possible.

6. Follow Up

  • Check in regularly: “I was thinking about you—how are you feeling today?”

  • Let them know they’re not a burden and that their life matters.

Counseling can be a scary step, but we want to make it as easy for you as possible. We have Counseling options in Houston, San Antonio, and virtual counseling! Contact us to learn more.

  

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